The Housekeeper's Secret: A Memoir
by Sandra Schnakenburg
She Writes Press


"I was overwhelmed with respect for what a survivor Lee was.... Lee Metoyer may have been the strongest person I've ever known."

"Whether the memory was all mine or crafted by storytelling, not since that summer afternoon in June 1965 when I was three and a half have I met anyone so life-changing." For Sandy Krilich, that person was Lee Metoyer, their family housekeeper, and the woman who changed the trajectory of Sandy's life. Lee comes into their family when Sandy is a little over three years old, her calm presence a breath of fresh air to the family. At first, Sandy worries that Lee, like the other housekeepers before her, will take flight after her initial trial weeks—intimidated by the rambunctious family of six children and six dogs, or by Mr. Krilich's unpredictable moods and iron-fisted rule. However, Lee stays on and remains a loyal confidante, protector, counselor, and surrogate parent within the family. She stands by the children when their father is imprisoned for tax evasion, supports Mrs. Krilich when she learns of her husband's infidelities, and buoys Sandy through the physical and emotional healing process after an accident. She remains a vital family member for the rest of her life.

"Someday, I'm going to write a book about my life, and no one will believe it!" Lee tells Sandy repeatedly, and so, nearing the end of her life, Sandy promises to write her story. However, despite their closeness, Lee has always been a mystery to Sandy: what little she knows about her housekeeper's past is shrouded in mystery. Sandy's promise to Lee lingers in the back of her mind until twenty-three years after Lee's death, when she and her siblings discover Lee's ashes while cleaning out their parents' home. Determined to return Lee's ashes to her biological family, Sandy embarks on an adventure spanning years and multiple states. In the process, she uncovers dark secrets of Lee's history, inspiring stories from the Metoyer lineage, and the knowledge that Lee was stronger, braver, and more resilient than she had ever suspected.

This memoir is a compelling and deeply personal portrait of unimaginable struggles, family ties, and inner strength. Written from "Sandy's" (the author's) perspective, the majority of the work centers around her life until the last quarter, which focuses on Lee's history. However, Sandy's own story is inspiring in itself: from suffering a life-changing accident to facing her father's wrath and putting herself through college, Sandy's persistence echoes Lee’s example in her life. Sandy's sharp memory of childhood events, her attention to even the smallest details, and her overwhelming compassion for her parents, siblings, and Lee fill her words with life. It is evident that discovering Lee's history and carrying on her legacy are the author's life's work. Her love for her former housekeeper is present on every page.

This work is fast-paced and easy to follow, even with at times difficult subject matter. Reading about Sandy's family struggles and accident, followed by multiple horrific incidents in Lee's life story, may make even the most seasoned reader's gut clench. Readers sensitive to verbal abuse, physical assault, or psychological trauma may wish to proceed with caution. However, the author imbues even the most difficult passages with incredible empathy and compassion. She demonstrates Sandy's and Lee's unending strength and willpower through their immense struggles, highlighting the resilience of love and the human spirit. In all, this is a stunning tribute to a woman who defied all odds to create a legacy of strength, hope, and love.

A 2025 Eric Hoffer Book Award Grand Prize Short List book

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